TALLINN — Commuters in Tallinn were faced with an unexpected proposal from the city’s tram service this week: trams will now exclusively serve hot soup instead of any passengers. Officials say this move is to embrace ‘the warmth of Estonian culture.‘
The new service, ‘Tramm Kuldne Supp’, allows riders to enjoy a steaming bowl of cabbage soup while thinking about the good old days when transportation made sense. ‘We always wanted to serve something warm during these long, grey winters,’ said tram director Peeter Kask. ‘This soup is basically like riding in a moving sauna… except you can’t sauna in a tram. Or can you?’
Residents are torn. Some welcome the change, seeing it as a fitting tribute to the national obsession with soup and the waiting game at tram stops. ‘I love nature, but I love soup even more,’ said local office worker Lauri Kalda. ‘Traffic jams are just perfect for a good borscht!’
“I miss the old tram vibes, but soup every day? Now that’s something I can dip my leib into.”
However, many are concerned about the practicality of trying to sip soup while navigating the often cutthroat environment of Old Town trams. ‘What happens if the tram suddenly stops? You could spill hot soup all over your winter coat!’ exclaimed tourist Marit Leht. ‘I didn’t come to Estonia to get scalded by cabbage soup!’
Currently, city officials are working to solve interpersonal conflict emerging from soup etiquette arguments brewing among commuters. At press time, parliament is debating whether to provide spoons or if a self-service approach would be more appropriate.